Friday, March 28, 2014



Right now I'm facing something called an existential crisis. I'm currently struggling with coming to terms with my own personal identity which lands me in a dilemma. And I don't always experience identity crises. Well, essentially it's about what I want to be. I don't really know what I believe in, I don't have a certain doctrine I particularly subscribe to. I simply believe in the greatness of God and Christ the Redeemer and I know that He will always be beside me. I've never thought so hard about this rather profound matter before such that it makes me feel so confused and lost. Feeling discombobulated is never a comforting feeling which made me further question what I really want to believe in, on my own accord. I do not wish to partake in a certain set of beliefs simply because my parents do, or according to popular culture. It's something I want to be proud of, to cherish and appreciate, to be sincere and to shape my actions and thoughts from it. Much more, I want it to come from within me and not something I was coerced into. While I have to say that I'm not a devout Christian, I do not deny the core values that Christianity advocates. Mark 12:31 says "The second is: 'Love your neighbor as yourself.' There is no commandment greater than these." Indeed, our Love for others is great, for Love transcends all boundaries.

Certainly, I've felt nothing but proud to be a Christian, to be Jesus's child and know that the Lord God is always next to me for He will not forsake or abandon me. I fervently believe that I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. I've never felt shameful to proclaim to others that I love the Holy Father and I believe that there is a God up there who will protect me and love me. Fumbling with my own identity has allowed me to reflect on the kind of person I want to be and what I want to believe in, and I'm glad I did. From young, I've been exposed to Christian elements and I just want to make sure that this is what I choose to truly believe in and I've made my choice. I choose to believe in God. I choose to rejoice in all that He has provided me with. I chose to be myself. And I shall love my God with all my heart and with all my soul, and with all my mind and with all my strength. Life is wonderful.

“There will come a time when all of us are dead. All of us. There will come a time when there are no human beings remaining to remember that anyone ever existed or that our species ever did anything. There will be no one left to remember Aristotle or Cleopatra, let alone you. Everything that we did and built and wrote and thought and discovered will be forgotten and all of this will have been for naught. Maybe that time is coming soon and maybe it is millions of years away, but even if we survive the collapse of our sun, we will not survive forever. There was time before organisms experienced consciousness, and there will be time after. And if the inevitability of human oblivion worries you, I encourage you to ignore it. God knows that’s what everyone else does.” 

― John Green


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