Saturday, March 1, 2014

Friends.

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It's March. And we're into the third month of 2014 and the 9th week of school. Wow, time really flies. Enough of that now and I'll go straight to the point. I would just like to share about something I've been reflecting about for a really long time.

I think I'm not very good at making friends. In my 16 years of life, I'm sure to say I have never really had a best friend, even now. I did and do have a couple better friends whom I could share my deepest darkest secrets and thoughts with. Having heart-to-heart talks once in a while is always a nice feeling. Having someone to listen to you pour out your emotions after an overwhelming day can be such great relief and painkillers. But people change. Many people come and go after leaving some sort of impact in life, and I do not deny that I still think about those fond memories from time to time, rereading old conversations, looking at old photos. I still do miss some of them. Admittedly, many of the friendships I've had don't seem to last. If I were to count the number of real friends I've had with my ten fingers, I would still have fingers left. Many times I look back and think, what did I do to destroy this special bond of ours? What happened? It always seems to start off on an exciting journey of getting to know each other, then slowly the novelty starts to wear off and the other person gets bored. The friendship begins to die away, like a star fading into the darkness. The question marks never seem to end and I know they will never be answered. I guess we just drifted apart. Or we were never meant to be. I actually am very envious of those who have found their life companions early, it's a really great feeling to have someone you know will stick by you in times of difficulty, share your secrets, happy times, forging so much more memories together.  

But hey, then again, I shouldn't forget those whom I'm still keeping in touch with, ever since we were young. It's really wonderful thinking how each of us went our separate ways and drifted apart, never expecting that we would cross paths. But we did (and proved that this world is not as a vast and lonely as it seems). Seeing how much we have grown, no more chubby cheeks or toothless smiles. The same old friends I always knew. The friendships that lasted more than a decade. I'm definitely grateful for those.

I've learnt that people come and go in our lives. If they're meant to stay, they will. But what I do not want to regret is not holding on to and cherishing my friendships when they lasted. 

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